Another Poem and Another Note. :(

Writing away as times passes by.
Hiding away from the blue sky.
Why are you still in my head.
Is there anything else to think about instead.
Dreams where you are happy with me.
That is something so I won't feel crappy.
I don't see why these thoughts still exist.
I believe I have accepted your decision
Yet, my mind wont let you go.
Try to tell me to have hope.
Doesn't pay sit around and mope.
What lies before me in the new year.
Will it be like this one full of fear.
Even so, I will not dwell on things that I cannot change.
Remember that it is gone so nothing is the same.
If there is hope for me, then I don't see it.
I feel as if I'm not even worth it.
Dreams are more forgiving than reality.
Who on this earth can forgive me.
Its burden that I bear.
To be in despair.
For the people who see as a monster that I am.
Who they claim they can understand.
But they never give me another chance.
Saying that It will just happen again.
Nobody knows that for sure.
I'm tired of feeling sore.
Not wanting any part of this anymore.