Helping Myself.

At times when I go to sleep, I wonder where are my dreams?
Just existing in a world where there is darkness all around me.
I can't really see have no idea where I am going.
Constantly keep triping and falling, man that's annoying.
Nightmares are different they come more frequently.
I see myself hanging my head because I'm failing.
Is this the end ?
When it finally hits me, will I truly understand?
That what folk say about me is wrong.
Listening to them is the same as listening to a repetitive song.
Not worth the headache or panic attacks.
I have to continue forward and not look back.
What I've done to myself and others. I cannot change.
As the year continues on, I will remain the same.
Going through life and lending a hand.
Helping myself to get better and doing what I can.

Overcoming Myself

I have a problem yes I do.
Is there something that I have done to you?
If I did something then I will say I am sorry.
Can I be forgiven? who knows. Probably.
I don't like being alone and yet I must wait.
Waiting for that person put to a smile on my face.
Going out there to look is waste of time.
It takes of lot of effort to make two lines rhyme.
At times I would just like to talk to someone.
It's hard to happiness but it easy to find a gun.
A gun to end all the pain.
Doing that and nothing would be the same.
I would lose everything.
Nothing would be left just me in the dark.
The end result of running into a shark.
Stress is the cause of all this.
It makes me lose my mind over nonsense.
Making me believe things that aren't really there.
Like everyone I walk past is giving me a stare.
I have to let go.
People can talk,What do they know?
I am who I am. I walk my own path.
Here to defend not to attack.

Struggling to survive.

I am troubled and I don't know why?
I am looking for answers instead I stare at the sky.
What I am looking for?
What is behind that door?
Am I too afraid to find out?
Losing faith and replacing it with doubt.
That is no way to live.
I am adult now, I am no longer a kid.
Even so, I get confused.
Lost without a clue.
Wandering around aimlessly in school.
Seeing how everyone has something to do.
I open up my hands and I see nothing.
Walking away sadly.
All those emotions pent up inside.
The pain hurts so much I want to cry.
Then so suddenly, I just stop.
Falling hard like a cinder block
Catching my breath, and standing up again.
I realize that it takes time to understand.
Understanding what I have to go through in day.
I struggle to survive while people look at me the wrong way.

Introduction about me

 In this room there is only one person here,  me. Why do I exist?
What is out there for me? I work at a convenience store 4 days out of the week.
I go to school 5 days a week. At times I do feel like no one is there.
I feel like those characters on the ninja anime Naruto. Especially Gaara.
My enemies are out there so i have to be careful.
I don't fear them but my heart races each time I see them.
at times I don't know what to do with myself.
In Order to exist in the world I must find myself.
I wish I knew what that meant.
With no one to show me the way.
I have to make my own way in this world.
Well I am not technically alone.
I know that God is watching over me.
and that i have friends who listen to my stories.
My family from time to time.
Helps me and gives me advice.
I like yugioh and I am surrounded by cards.
It's kinda my thing.
So is writing and that explains why I am doing that now.
Who Am I?
My name is Steven... and This is my story.

How I feel On Valentine's day

What am I? Am I a freak?
I have a voice but i don't speak.
Should I go outside and shout to the sky.
Will I get the answer explaining why?
I live for myself and to do the right thing.
Staying away from the negativity they bring.
I am stuck at times in a endless loop.
Clueless where to go and what to do?
I wander and wander till I cannot go any more.
Exhausted, I fall to the floor.
Wondering why I am so weak?
Thinking... What could be my destiny?
I am not going to find it by staring at the floor.
I will get up and go through that door.
As a man,who does what he can.
I listen to people so I can understand.
Dealing with problems is a part of life.
Listening to God, I know he's right.
I will not allow those thoughts to consume me.
A ghost one moment and a man the next.
Who Am I. I am Jynex.
That is who I am remember that.
That I live for the truth and actual facts.
No time for people who are lying.
Lies leads to stress that leads to dying.
I have only one life. Not worth it.
I would like my days to be without the bulls**t.

I am A Wolf.

The wolf.
Who walks alone.
As long as he is alone, he continues to roam.
To find a place where he can belong.
Society deems him as an outcast.
Depressed at time and it's bad when it lasts.
Looking for someone to share good times with.
Someone who can relate to him.
Walking past all these ignorant folk.
He doesn't like when people aim to provoke.
Thinking, what is wrong with them?
He has his own problems.
They shouldnt judge off the way he looks.
Mistaking him for some heinous crook.
He doesnt want the praise or the title of the king.
The wolf only stands for doing the right thing.
Helping those who are in need of help.
Giving advice to those unable to help themselves.
He doesnt need the lies or the games.
Bad enough that people think that he is strange.
Let them think that.
Oblivious to the fact.
That the wolf is the wolf.
He will always be, that is his destiny.

Here's Shorty- a short poem

I am wandering from one place to another.
Searching for my significant other.
I am shy person and I don't know why.
I am more than what meets the eye.
There are times where I am optimistic.
Other times, I get really sick.
I have to take care of my health.
Being no one else but myself.
Meeting up with people that are cool.
Coming to school to learn something new.

Running for the Future

Wondering what the next day will bring?
Going to school each day and experiencing new things.
Observing groups of people talking and having fun.
Social experiment tells me I shouldn't talk to anyone.
Walking around so quietly not making a sound.
I go to that secluded place that is high above the ground.
At most times I do feel confused about who I am?
Looking at other folk, I can only do what I can.
I don't want to be like the rest of these guys.
Acting dumb to get laughs and always looking high.
I want to find a girl who isn't about looking all that.
A woman who actually cares and who doesn't mind sharing a snack.
Lending a hand when someone needs help.
Finding strength in myself.
Accepting my responsibility.
Not giving into the pressures of society.
Making the effort to pass my class.
Hoping to find clues to my unknown past.
One day I know my memory will return.
For now taking the time to live and learn.